T-minus one day

So tomorrow is my 31st birthday and I'm torn between being depressed about it, which is my gut reaction, and trying to put on a happy face for the sake of my family and friends because I know that's the logical thing to do. Everybody knows I'm kind of down about my birthday every year, so those close to me (my husband and my mom) are doing their best to plan something that will make it a nice day without being too pushy. Little things, like my husband asked for the day off from work just in case I wanted to do something, and my mom offered up a shopping trip. I give them credit for keeping their distance on the topic, but every time I say something like "I just want to ignore it" I know I'm disappointing them and I know they think I'm being overly dramatic. People can't seem to understand that it's not that I care about the number. I really could care less that I'm turning 31....it could be 41 and still my reaction would be the same because it marks another year without a child. Another milestone has passed me by and I'm no closer to my goal. So, it remains to be seen what the plan will end up being for tomorrow. We'll see if my gut of my head wins.